I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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