i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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