Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
