At least make sure they are 18
Why
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Randomize
