The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
