Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
