Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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