the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
