Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
