A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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