after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
It was like getting head from an anaconda
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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