Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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