Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
