about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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