Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
