she looked like the before picture.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
