Just fell off a train. Bad.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
you are never too drunk for berry picking
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
