After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
