pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
