my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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