so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
