i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
i think my mom watched the whole time
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
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