so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
