she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Sacagawea was the original milf.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize