Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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