after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
