why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
