so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
