Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
