it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
