i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Randomize
