just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Randomize
