So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
