The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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