Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
