He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Who died my cat blue again?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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