Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
