3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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