If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
