Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
There r osticjed everywhere
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
