Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
why is half of my head shaved?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
