Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
