Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
home. puking in laundry basket.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
