Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
