I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
