Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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