Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Don't make out with my wife yet
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
