And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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