I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
We have started to decorate penises.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
