I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I have aggressive nipples.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
